Let's Build a Matrix 5

Now we have had conversations about each of the quadrants.

1. Who's important to us,
2. What shows up inside of us and gets in the way,
3. What behaviors do we do to move away from what we don't want inside of us,
and
4. What behaviors can we do to move toward who's important while having that unwanted stuff?

We are now ready to notice moving toward and away. Some people might wonder, who does the noticing? Of course that's 'me." As the song says, "the name I call myself." We don't dwell on the me. Simply put it's the part of us that shows up early in life and starts noticing almost every experience. It's a piece of cake for the me to notice Toward and Away.

For the most part, the rest of Matrix Work is practicing the noticing of Toward and Away behaviors.

Kevin


Kevin L. Polk, Ph.D.
ACT Gone Wild Training and Consulting
We train individuals and groups of all sizes.

Book: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B004M8S4Z4
Web:  http://www.drkevinpolk.com
Blog:  http://drkevinpolk.blogspot.com/

Let's Build a Matrix 4: Taking Unwanted Stuff Along

In Let's Build a Matrix 1 we talked about Who's Important.

In Let's Build a Matrix 2 we talked about unwanted stuff that can show up and get in the way of moving toward who's important.

In Let's Build a Matrix 3 we talked about the behaviors we do to move away from unwanted experiencing.

Now in Let's Build a Matrix 4 we talk about what we can do AND take the unwanted experiencing along for the ride. We label the right side of the horizontal line "Toward."

In this example someone has sais, "I could talk to my family about an issue, taking fear along."

Another said, "I could go to a movie with friends even though I'm feeling tired and want to go to bed."

Next time we will started training the Toward and Away discrimination.

Kevin


Kevin L. Polk, Ph.D.
ACT Gone Wild Training and Consulting
We train individuals and groups of all sizes.

Book: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B004M8S4Z4
Web:  http://www.drkevinpolk.com
Blog:  http://drkevinpolk.blogspot.com/

Let's Build a Matrix 3: What we do to move away from unwanted experiencing

In Let's Build a Matrix 1 we talked about the people who are important to us.

In Let's Build a Matrix 2 we talked about the stuff that shows up inside of us that might get in the way of moving toward who's important to us.

Now we collaborate around the stuff that we do to move Away from unwanted experiences going on inside of us.

I usually start with moving Away from Fear as an example, and about the same time write "Away" just above the left side of the horizontal line.

Then we have a conversation about the behaviors we do to move away from unwanted stuff like fear, anger, sadness and such.

I usually connect the unwanted stuff and the behavior with an arched line like you see in the drawing. This is the beginning of a discussion about the "unworkable change agenda" we will have later if we have enough time.

Any behavior can be used to move away, so you see 'meditation' showing up as an away move. A popular 'away' move not on the board is drinking alcohol, but it usually makes it up there in the presentations I do.

In Let's Build a Matrix 4 we draw attention back to the Toward side of the diagram.

Kevin

Kevin L. Polk, Ph.D.
ACT Gone Wild Training and Consulting
We train individuals and groups of all sizes.


Book: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B004M8S4Z4
Web:  http://www.drkevinpolk.com
Blog:  http://drkevinpolk.blogspot.com/

Automatic Mindfulness

Hi Folks,

I noticed that I forgot to mention "Automatic Mindfulness" during the conference call I just posted. Here is something like I would have said if I remembered:

• The Matrix and it's routines are automatic mindfulness. You don't have to mention mindfulness because it's built into the process. When I ask, "Notice the difference between how it feels to move Away and move Toward," we all take a 'step back' from our experience of the language (the sentence I just wrote) and instead look back upon our experience, and that's mindful.

At least something like that.

--------------------------------------------

I have recently read the book The Tree of Knowledge The Biological Roots of Human Understanding by Maturana and Varela and the paper Evolving the Future: Toward a Science of Intentional Change by Wilson, Hayes, Biglan, and Embr.

Way cool intellectual stuff ripe for putting into an experiential routine connected to the matrix diagram. I'll work out the routine and post on YouTube soon. At least that my current plan.

Be Well,

Kevin

Kevin L. Polk, Ph.D.
Psychological Flexibility Expert



Striving for Instant Access to Psychological Flexibility, 100% of the Time