White Mt Flexibility

The girls and I are visiting the White Mts. (Just passed by Mt. Washington). Goofing on the Blackberry while the girls shop. My mother said I was a bad shopper by age four. Discovered mobile blogging. Here goes.

Some have asked about the significance of psychological flexibility. Why name your blog that? It's all about learning what works, and learning is best when you are in a flexible state of mind; the state of mind of a birth to two year old.

Recall how the one-year old learns. The one-year old does not know what is "right." The one-year old just learns. As adults we consciously or unconsciously "know" stuff that limits learning new behaviors. For example, knowing that you don't know how to swim can seriously interfere with learning how to swim. Knowing how to drive a car on the left side of the road interferes with driving on the right side of the road.

For a more extreme example, when you experience a very frightening event, that can really jam up your learning. So the non swimmer who almost drowns won't even go in the pool.

So the more you know, the less quickly you learn new behaviors.

The more you know the less psychologically flexible you are, and the less open you are to your sensory experiences.

I think this is the root of much of the mindfulness and meditation stuff in the world. What that's mostly about is more flexible learning. I just don't think you need the traditional mindfulness to get there.

Taking a moment to blend sensory experiencing with mental experiencing a few times a day is a good start. Listening for flexibility also helps get you to flexible learning of what works.

Well now my thumbs are tired. Off to experience the fall colors of New England.

Take care,

Kevin

Listening for Flexibility

Psychological inflexibility, aka “feeling stuck,” is a byproduct of words. We start right out of the womb as flexible little learners, soaking up information through our five senses, and finally relating that information to words. As time goes by the words get stronger and stronger. We pay less attention to our five senses experiencing and more attention to the words in our heads. Of course the words are wonderful and allow us to communicate with others. However, the price we pay is less flexible learning. That is, we can believe what the words in our heads are telling us instead of integrating the information that is also available to us through the five senses. Most of the time less flexible learning is no big deal, but at other times it keeps us stuck doing things that just don’t work for valued living. The trick is to let go of the words a bit and pay more attention to what our five senses are letting us know about the world. One of the easiest ways to do that is by listening for flexibility.

[The following is an experiment. If you get a chance to do the experiment, please let me know about your results in the comments section of this blog.] 

When someone is speaking to you notice the impact that his or her words have on your psychological flexibility. Do the words “feel” flexible inside of you? Does it feel like you have more or less options after hearing the words? You do this noticing in an instant and you really don’t spend any time analyzing it. Just notice the flexibility and either keep listening or respond. After you have responded to the person, then does the next thing the person says feel more or less flexible?

To review:

1. You are first noticing the flexibility of the speaker’s words as they rattle around inside of you,
2. then you are noticing what you say after hearing the flexibility, 
3. and then you return to listening for flexibility. 

You really can’t think about this process much; there is just not enough time. It’s much like learning balancing on a bicycle; you don’t have time to think about balancing and steering. You simply notice the balance, notice doing the next action, and then notice the balance. The more you ride the more natural the process becomes. It’s the same when you are learning listening for flexibility; in one fluid motion you notice the flexibility, notice what you do next, and then return to noticing flexibility.

Take care,

Kevin

P.S.

I have recorded this blog post to the Psychological Flexibility podcast at: http://drkevinpolk.podbean.com/.

View the psychological flexibility videos at: http://www.youtube.com/drkevinpolk.

Post your comments about noticing flexibility on this blog.

The Question

Given what's important to you, what are you willing to do and experience to move you in that direction, in this moment?

The Psychological Flexibility Podcast: Values

In this episode we briefly review the psychological flexibility warm up, and then we "move" over to the values side of the matrix. We discuss values and chosen directions, a little about behaviors that move us toward values, and then a bit about noticing internal and external experiencing while moving (or not moving) toward values.

Next episode will be about moving away from unwanted mental experiencing.

Kevin

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Check out the new webinars, including the Free intro to ACTraining for Procrastination:

https://student.gototraining.com/catalog/109687771

I also do individual consulting/coaching. Just email me and we will set up a time.

Warm Regards,

Kevin

(Webinar) The Matrix, ACT and Working with Trauma Memories

Hi Folks,

I was asked to post the announcement for my Working with Trauma Memories webinar.

Announcement:

There is no prerequisite for knowing ACT or The Matrix for this webinar. All levels of clinical experience are welcome.

This course will be four sessions covering how to set up and collaborate with people who suffer with trauma memories.

Session 1: Setting up The Matrix and rapport building.

Session 2: Reviewing homework, values (moving toward) work.

Session 2: Reviewing homework, defusion (moving away) work.

Session 2: Reviewing homework, "Blending" five senses experiencing with mental (trauma memories) experiencing while moving toward.

As you can see, this is largely about how to set up the Matrix and then use the processes (noticing 5-senses experiencing, mental experiencing, moving toward and moving away) for the client to "blend" these experiences from a psychological flexible point of view.

You set the fee for this webinar. I trust you to pay a combination of what you can afford and what you think it's worth.

The webinar will be audio recorded and you will receive an mp3 (iTunes compatible) recording after each session.

Sign up at:

https://student.gototraining.com/register/8873563480481469211

Take Care:

Kevin

Blog is back to drkevinpolk

Hi folks,

Sorry for any mixup. I thought I could give the blog a new address, but I ran into technical difficulties.

The address is back to http://drkevinpolk.blogspot.com/.




Kevin

The old drkevinpolk address is back

Hi folks,

Sorry for any mixup. I thought I could give the blog a new address, but I ran into technical difficulties.

The address is back to http://drkevinpolk.blogspot.com/.

Kevin