Free Call and Low Cost Training

Hi Folks,

Reminder that the Free Matrix Conference call is Tuesdays at 5pm EST USA.

There's a low cost, four week training coming up in November. Email me if you're interested.

The next "Let's Build a Matrix" post will be out soon.

Kevin
Book: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B004M8S4Z4
Web:  http://www.drkevinpolk.com
Blog:  http://drkevinpolk.blogspot.com/



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Let's Build a Matrix 2: Unwanted Mental Experiencing

After having a conversation about who's important, we next draw the groups attention to the stuff that can show up inside of us and sometimes get in the way of moving toward who's important. As in the example above, I usually say "Fear" and put it on the board. I might also throw in another one like "Doubt." It depends on the audience. Sometimes I prime the group toward including thoughts like "I can't" into the mix.

If you were watching me working with this audience you would several times hear me say something like...

"So the image of moving toward your friends shows up, and then fear sometimes shows up and gets in the way."

or

"So sometimes stuff like doubt shows up and gets in the way of moving toward your family."

Almost invariably during this "what shows up and sometimes gets in the way conversation" you would hear me say something like...

"Isn't it amazing how this stuff shows up on the inside of us and sometimes ends up getting in the way of us doing something physical? The physical action is simple, like walking or talking, but this stuff can show up on the inside and it seems to grab us. I know it happens to me all to often."

---------------------------

Technical: 

First we started the values (who's important) collaboration in Let's Build a Matrix 1, and now we have moved the conversation over to talking about what sometimes shows up inside of us and gets in the way of moving toward who's important. 

We are all familiar with this stuff that shows up and 'grabs' us and sometimes leads us away from doing toward who's important.

Notice that I am including myself in this mix, this Matrix. I too have people that are important to me and I have stuff that shows up on the inside and at times gets in the way of moving toward who's important.

This is genuinely showing the ACT stance; we are all in the same boat pulling on different oars.

"Showing Up"

In this example you are also seeing me us the ACT-consistent language of "showing up" rather than causal language. For example, I could instead say, "You thought about going out with your friends and that caused you to have fear." This is mechanistic language saying that thinking of friends invariably leads to fear: Friends -> Fear. This is not a link that we want to be training.

By using language like, "Showing up" we are moving toward contextual languaging. [Yes, currently there is no such word as languaging. However, for contextual conversations in English, adding 'ing' to words can help with the contextualizing.] Here's how contextual languaging might sound...

Me: "So you noticed thinking about your friends, and then you noticed fear showing up. When you think about your friends, do you notice other inside stuff showing up?

Audience member: "Yes, 'like' shows up. I like my friends."

Me: "Cool. You noticed the thought of going out with your friends and both like and fear showed up. 'Like' might go over hear."

I then put (like) next to friends on the board. (see below)

Now we have fear showing up on the away side of the matrix and like showing up on the toward side. We have moved toward contextual languaging and we're showing it on a diagram.

"Sometimes"

You also might have noticed I use words like "sometimes" a lot. That's also contextual language. It's easy for us all to slip into mechanistic speech like, "This shows up and then that [always] happens." The 'always' is in brackets because it's inferred. We don't say it out loud, but it's there. The more accurate is, " ________ shows up and sometimes _________ shows up along with it.

In brief, life is most often about probabilities (sometimes) and seldom about invariability, so we reflect that in our languaging.

"Noticing"

You might also have noticed that I use the words, "So you were noticing __________ showing up." That's noticing language, the "automatic mindfulness" of the Matrix. Using the words notice, noticing and noticed helps us all 'step back' and look at things from a bigger 'Toward and Away' picture.

In Let's Build a Matrix 3 we will continue the conversation focusing the behaviors that we all do in the service of moving Away from unwanted internal stuff like fear, doubt and 'I can't."

Make sure to email me if you're interested in the low cost training.

Be Well,

Kevin

Kevin L. Polk, Ph.D.
Book: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B004M8S4Z4
Web:  http://www.drkevinpolk.com
Blog:  http://drkevinpolk.blogspot.com

Free Conference Call Info:


Access code is 496959#

USA +1 559 546 1301
Australia* +61 1300 781 250
Austria +43 (0) 1 265 05 60
Canada +1 559 546 1333
Czech Republic +420 225 989 115
France +33 (0) 1 8014 0690
Germany +49 (0) 355 475 4400
Japan +81 3 5050 5070
Netherlands +31 (0) 20 322 3020
Nigeria +234 1 667 0007
Portugal +351 21005 1184
Romania +40 317 807 040
South Africa +27 87 825 0140
Spain +34 91 119 6730
Switzerland +41 (0) 44 595 9050
United Kingdom +44 (0) 784 843 2915

Let's Build a Matrix 1: Who is Important?

Here's how I start a Matrix:

Standing in front of a whiteboard, chalkboard, etc., I say something like, "I like to start by knowing who's important to folks. People like family, friends, and such. Who is important to you?"

I quickly draw the vertical and horizontal lines of the Matrix and start writing the responses in the lower, right quadrant. Whatever is said, I write it. So if someone says, "Me, that's who's important to me" I would write 'me.' If someone said, "My dog." Then I would write 'dog.'

Why write almost anything someone in a group says?

1. Because I'm getting a conversation about values started, not finished. 
2. The basic stance of doing the matrix (and ACT in general) is "Yes, and..."
3. Those familiar with improvisation know that "yes, and..." is the secret. To say "no" stops the routine. I almost never say "no," I want to keep the routine flowing.

Those familiar with ACT will see this as "values" work, and it is. Some have asked me, "Why do you start with values?" My answer is because that's where the most juice is; ultimately what motivates us is doing for others. This establishes that "target" first thing.

Next time we will move to the lower, left quadrant.

Be Well,

Kevin

website: www.drkevinpolk.com

book: www.amazon.com/dp/B004M8S4Z4 

ACT - the Matrix Typical Diagram

Typical looking Matrix Diagram toward the end of a presentation.

Be well,

Kevin

Book: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B004M8S4Z4
Website: www.drkevinpolk.com

Striving for Instant Access to Psychological Flexibility, 100% of the Time

Automatic Mindfulness

Hi Folks,

I noticed that I forgot to mention "Automatic Mindfulness" during the conference call I just posted. Here is something like I would have said if I remembered:

• The Matrix and it's routines are automatic mindfulness. You don't have to mention mindfulness because it's built into the process. When I ask, "Notice the difference between how it feels to move Away and move Toward," we all take a 'step back' from our experience of the language (the sentence I just wrote) and instead look back upon our experience, and that's mindful.

At least something like that.

--------------------------------------------

I have recently read the book The Tree of Knowledge The Biological Roots of Human Understanding by Maturana and Varela and the paper Evolving the Future: Toward a Science of Intentional Change by Wilson, Hayes, Biglan, and Embr.

Way cool intellectual stuff ripe for putting into an experiential routine connected to the matrix diagram. I'll work out the routine and post on YouTube soon. At least that my current plan.

Be Well,

Kevin

Kevin L. Polk, Ph.D.
Psychological Flexibility Expert



Striving for Instant Access to Psychological Flexibility, 100% of the Time

Name Change: ACT - the Matrix

Hi folks,

I changed the name of the blog to ACT-the Matrix to mesh with a facebook page by that name.

I also recorded and uploaded the Free ACT-the Matrix conference call to the ACBS website. I'm working on getting it on iTunes as a podcast. The link to ACBS is below. You will need to join ACBS to download the mp3, but joining is as little as $1.00 (values-based dues).

http://contextualpsychology.org/blog/act_the_matrix_free_conference_call_quotautomatic

The book is at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B004M8S4Z4

Be well,

Kevin

Striving for Instant Access to Psychological Flexibility, 100% of the Time

Free "Automatic Mindfulness" Call: ACT the Matrix

Free Conference Call: ACT: the Matrix
Today we will focus on "Automatic Mindfulness"

Tuesday, October 25, 2011 at 5pm EST USA

The lasts about an hour. I'm going to try and record this one!

Access Code is 496959#

USA +1 559 546 1301
Australia* +61 1300 781 250
Austria +43 (0) 1 265 05 60
Canada +1 559 546 1333
Czech Republic +420 225 989 115
France +33 (0) 1 8014 0690
Germany +49 (0) 355 475 4400
Japan +81 3 5050 5070
Netherlands +31 (0) 20 322 3020
Nigeria +234 1 667 0007
Portugal +351 21005 1184
Romania +40 317 807 040
South Africa +27 87 825 0140
Spain +34 91 119 6730
Switzerland +41 (0) 44 595 9050
United Kingdom +44 (0) 784 843 2915

Be well,

Kevin

Free ACT - the Matrix Conference Call

Dial +1 559 546 1301 for a one hour call with Kevin Polk. 

All the basics of ACT - the Matrix, plus an introduction to 

using the diagram in Primary Care and school settings.

This call is aimed at professionals interested in beneficially

influencing others.

Contact Kevin@drkevinpolk.com for the access code.